Being the maid of honour is an honour. But, let’s be honest, it can also be a huge responsibility.
You’re most likely the first person to get asked to be part of the wedding party. You have to help plan the bachelorette party. And then you have to coordinate with all of these other bridesmaids. You’re also expected to look amazing in all of your photos and get gifts for everyone who helped out with planning the wedding. Plus, you’re supposed to keep it all together when your friend is freaking out about how her ex is going to show up at the reception or how her mom might not like her dress.
It’s a lot! And sometimes it just feels like it’s too much—especially if you’re already dealing with other stressors in your life. But no matter how hard it gets, don’t forget why you decided to do this in the first place. Your friend means so much to you and she deserves all of this joyous celebration as she starts her new life with her partner.
If you’re feeling like being a maid of honour is taking over your life, here are some tips on how you can make it easier:
Know what your role is.
The first thing is to recognize what the bride wants from you. If you’re not sure what your responsibilities as a maid of honour are, talk to the bride about what she expects from you before signing on for the job. She’ll probably have some ideas about how she’d like things done. But she’ll also be open to hearing your ideas for making things easier for everyone involved.
Your maid of honour duties are going to be much easier if you’ve got a system in place before the wedding date arrives. Use Google Keep or another note app to keep track of everything you need to do, including things like registering for gifts, and making sure everyone knows where they’re supposed to be for the bachelor/bachelorette party, and keeping track of what people are bringing as their contribution towards the wedding (food).
This is the first rule for anyone who needs to organize something big. And trust us when we say that planning a wedding is one of the biggest things out there! The more time you have to plan, the more prepared you’ll be when it comes to making sure everything runs smoothly on the big day. If your friend is busy with work or school, make sure she knows about important deadlines early so there aren’t any surprises later down the road.
Know the other bridesmaids.
Make sure you know who all your bridesmaids are. It might seem obvious at first glance, but sometimes people forget their friends have been named as bridesmaids too! And if you’re planning on wearing different coloured dresses? Make sure those colours match up with each other! The last thing anyone wants is for someone’s dress to clash with yours—unless that’s part of your theme and look (in which case… go wild).
Don’t take over everything.
let other people get involved too! Delegate tasks to other bridesmaids. Ask your friends and family if they’d like to help out with any parts of the planning process. Make sure everyone has something they can do so that everyone feels included in the celebration of your friend’s upcoming marriage. It is important however, to do regular check ins with people you delegated tasks to. With this, you can be sure that everyone is doing what they are supposed to do per time.
Take Time for Yourself.
You might feel like there’s no time for yourself during this busy period, but we promise there is! You need to take care of yourself so that when all those bridesmaids ask you questions during the big day (and they will!), you’ll be able to answer them calmly and clearly instead of sounding frazzled or stressed out.
Don’t forget to ask for help.
Your best friend is counting on you, but she doesn’t want you to burn out or stress yourself out unnecessarily. So if there are things on your plate that are too much for one person to handle, don’t be afraid to delegate! And remember: Just because someone agrees to do something doesn’t mean they have to do it perfectly. Somethings will not be one hundred per cent perfect (like making sure all the gifts are wrapped), don’t worry about it too much. It’s okay for things not to be perfect when we’re doing them for our best friends.
To sum up, it’s important to remember that a big part of being the maid of honour is just making sure that you keep the bride happy on her big day. Do what is best for her. This will come back to you later. Be there for your fellow bridesmaids because they are the ones that will be there for you when things don’t go as planned (and they very well may not).
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